Weiss and the Cheesy Christmas
by DragonLadyRM
Summary: After Kapitel and the OAVs, Aya-chan lives with Weiss in the Koneko. But she and Omi have an extra credit project to partake in this Christmas holiday and its traditions...later chp(s) includes Schwarz. Yaoi and het pairings. Dec24 chp4 up.
1. Weiss and the Cheesy Christmas Special

Takes place in a never-never land after the OAVs (but no Gluhen), where our guys have relocated to a rebuilt Koneko no Sumu Ie and are joined by Aya-chan, so same continuity as my other Weiss fics, all two of 'em, sigh. Pairings are in the story; to give them here would spoil the fun. Other notes at end.

**_Weiss and the Cheesy Christmas Special_**

Movie night again at the Koneko. Only this time it was winter solstice. The horror!

"Chibi, no way in hell am I watching _It's a Wonderful Life_, not after the nightmares I had after the last American movie you had me watch."

"But Yooohji-kun! It's a classic!"

"No, no, and no! With my luck, I'll have a nightmare that I'm George Bailey! And he's way too boring for everyone's favorite Kudoh Yohji!"

"But wouldn't Clarence be more of a nightmare for you?" a female voice chimed in. "Somehow I can't see you being caught dead in that drafty old nightgown. -- No, wait, he _would_ be dead!" And she giggled.

"Aya-chan! That is _not_ funny!"

"Who do you think his subconconcious would cast as Mr. Potter? Takatori almost seems too obvious."

"You're right. But there's no question who he'd cast as Mary –"

"Aya!" "Ran!" the two evil teenagers chorused. (1)

Yohji collapsed on the couch. "How many times do I have to tell you two: there is nothing going on between Aya and me!"

Aya-chan held an imaginary microphone to Omi's mouth and in her best reporter manner, asked "Tsukiyono-san? Do we have an answer on that?"

Omi returned her grin and replied "Fujimiya-san, I believe he's told us that as many times as we've caught him staring at Aya-kun's ass."

"Don't forget to add in all the times he's growled at any cute man who flirts with Ran-nii in the shop." (2)

"Oh yes, and we can't forget all the times he's sketched Aya making arrangements, too."

Yohji covered his face and groaned. "Evil. You two are evil. And what were you doing in my sketchbook, anyway?"

Aya-chan gave her best wide-eyed look of innocence that was clearly a blatant falsehood. "Why, whatever do you mean, Yohji-nii?"

He threw a pillow at her. "I still say you're evil. And that look won't work on me. Omi's used it on me too many times." True, but she didn't need to know she had other weapons in her arsenal that would work.

Oh no. No, no, NO! She sniffed and gave him a look that indicated he was a puppy-kicker of the worst sort. "Are you saying you don't like me?"

He groaned and sank lower in the couch. "No, dammit. I'm not saying that at all. Just – just stay out of my sketchbook, is all." Oh fuck. Why did he say that? Now he'd have to lock it up away from them both. It didn't matter that Omi didn't care about its contents; Aya-chan had her boyfriend wrapped around her little finger and the little traitor would gladly help his girlfriend in any information quests. "Is that the look that got Aya to agree to your dating Omi?" (3)

The wounded look quickly disappeared, only to be replaced with a blatantly false artlessness. "Why? Asking for tips, Yohji?"

He needed a topic change, quick. "Why do you two want to watch some boring old American movie, anyway? Isn't there something better on TV? Or at the video store?"

Aya-chan gave him a wink that indicated she knew he was changing the topic but she'd go along with it. "No, Yohji-nii, that's not it. It's extra credit for our English class."

"Because it's in English?"

"No, we can watch it in Japanese," said Omi. "It's the holiday, you see. The teacher thought it would be a good way for us to learn about Christmas."

"But does it have to be that movie? And why do you want all of us to watch it?"

"Noo. It can be another movie about Christmas, or a, a – what did the teacher call it?"

"A Christmas special, Omi-kun. Apparently this Christmas is an important holiday in the United States, and there are TV shows created just for it. We'd get extra credit for watching some of those, but we can't find any at the video store and with the shipping costs, it's expensive to order them over the internet. Omi looked into it." And she gave her boyfriend a fond look.

Ken plopped down on the couch next to him. "TV shows from the United States? We get those."

"Really, Ken-kun?" asked an eager Aya-chan.

"Yep. How do you think I keep up with all my football matches in Europe and South America? Satellite!"

"Even the United States?" asked Omi.

"Yep, even the States. So, what'd you wanna watch?"

"Some Christmas shows, please!"

Yohji groaned again. "Ken's here. Do I have to watch this stuff with you?"

Apparently it was Omi's turn with the wide eyes. "Please, Yohji-kun! Then we can all talk about it! And if we can duplicate some of the traditions, we'll get even more extra credit!"

"Extra credit? Why would you need extra credit? I thought you were doing well in all your classes, both of you. You both told me that – dating – wouldn't affect your grades."

Yes, Aya had entered as quietly as the cats of their codenames. And damn, he looked good, too. But when didn't he?

"Nii-chan! Of course we're doing well! But it never hurts to have more points, you know!" She promptly followed her own advice, hugging Aya and scoring some points with him. "Please watch with us!" (4)

A slight smile crossed his face. "And what are we watching?"

She turned to Omi and Ken, who were busy flipping through onscreen menus and options. "Omi-kun? Ken-kun? Are there any Christmas shows on today?"

Omi looked up. "Ken-kun's checking the onscreen listings; I'll go check on the computer."

"Wait a minute. Looks like there's something available in 45 minutes. Some show about a deer."

"A deer? I thought Americans liked to hunt them. How is that part of a holiday?"

Ken frowned and flipped through to the program description. "Don't know, but 'Christmas' is in the description." He shrugged. "Guess we'll find out in 43 minutes."

Aya-chan clapped, excited. "Great! That gives us time to get some snacks together! Omi?" And like the obedient boyfriend he was, he followed Aya-chan to the kitchen.

While Ken sat on the floor in front of the TV, still flipping through the various listings, Aya joined Yohji on the couch. In a low voice, he asked, "Do I want to know what I've gotten myself into?"

Yohji grinned. "Why spoil the surprise? Besides, I only remember bits and pieces from my childhood. I'll show you the tradition with mistletoe later, when we're alone." And he squeezed Aya's thigh.

Any further actions were halted as Ken moved back into one of the chairs to better watch the news.

* * *

Some forty-odd minutes later: 

"Do Americans really think snowmen can sing? And why does that one have a mustache?"

"Yohji, hush!"

* * *

And another ten minutes later: 

"Please, let me gouge my eyes out! I can't take this any more!"

"Shut up, Kudoh. If you can stand a five-hour Sailor Moon marathon, you can handle a little stop-action animation. Even if it is bad."

"How old is this show? I thought you said they made shows just for the holiday; surely they can afford new ones every year!"

"Yohji, if you don't shut up, I'm getting my darts!"

* * *

Five minutes from that: 

"Either that thing's cancerous, or that deer has a drinking problem!" And a snicker.

"Yohji, no one thinks you're funny."

"If drinking did that, why isn't your nose blinking too, Kudoh?"

"Hmph. No sense of humor, any of you."

* * *

And later still: 

"This Santa could clearly use some white hunters of his own. Who lets a menace like that live near their home?"

A chorus of four voices: "**YOHJI, HUSH!**"

* * *

Finally, it was over. To no one's surprise, someone was overreacting. And overacting, too. 

"ARRGH! I can still hear that song playing in my head! MAKE IT STOP! Quick, somebody, stop me before I sing it out loud!"

He was pelted with pillows and left alone, moaning, as the others filed out of the room to the kitchen, discussing the show.

* * *

Later that night in his bedroom, he grinned as Aya snuck in. Once the door was shut, he offered what he thought was a reasonable suggestion. 

"So, would you like to play some of the other reindeer games?"

"Kudoh, just shut up and kiss me."

And he did.

-end-

Notes  
(1) Aya-chan calls her brother Ran, but everyone is still calling him Aya at this point. I call her "Aya-chan" so I don't go nuts trying to remember if it's Brother or Sister in a scene. What can I say, it's a Weiss fic convention I like.  
(2) Yes, Aya-chan is playing mind games with her uses of "-kun" and "-nii".  
(3) Those who read my LJ account and comments will recognize hints of yaoi-fangirl!Aya-chan. Yohji's right to be afraid for his sketchbook.  
(4) While informal, "nii-chan" _is_ something Aya-chan would use in addressing her brother.  
(5) And I don't have to tell you what the Christmas Special was, do I? grins I will, though, as I don't know if it's shown outside the States. If not, please let me know and I'll supply the gory details.

A setting comment. It's not scribblemoose's Ronin universe but it's inspired in part by it. I like the setting both for timeline (post OAVs, non-Gluhen) and circumstance (Do you really think Aya-chan would let Ran keep her away? And for pity's sake, get the guys out of the van!), so think of it as a parallel universe of sorts. Haven't figured out how the Dramatic CDs fit in just yet.

And finally: Have a Happy Winter Solstice!

21Dec2004: Hopefully I've removed errors caused by uploading conversion: missing breaks, that kind of thing. - DLRM


	2. Son of Cheesy Christmas The Song Fic!

And because Yohji can't leave well enough alone, he vigorously pointed out I hadn't given him anything twisted to do – with Aya, of course. So with much nudging from Yohji-muse (who now owes me as I have now crossed another "I will never write a" line), I give you –

**_Weiss and Son of Cheesy Christmas Special: The Song Fic!!!_**

The following morning saw Yohji and Aya alone in the Koneko shop, doing a little cleaning and preparing arrangements for delivery later in the day by Ken. Normal day. _Boring_ day. But a bored Yohji is not a good Yohji, no; in fact it was a devilish Yohji. And this one recalled more of the Christmases of his childhood and one of his more favorite traditions: mangling Christmas songs. With Aya here and that damn TV show still running through his head, he had both target and weapon. So the singing began.

....._Aya the red-haired florist_

"Kudooooh," came the growl.

Yohji just ignored it and kept on singing. As long as Aya's hands were busy with that arrangement, they couldn't go around his throat.

....._Had a very shiny sword_

"Kudoh! Shut up! We're in the shop, remember?"

....._And if you ever saw it_

"I'd have to kill you, because it meant you were in my bedroom, uninvited. Which is what you will be, Kudoh, if you don't shut up soon."

....._You might even say it grows_

"'_It grows_?' Kudoh, please!"

He stopped singing – but only for a moment – to reply. "Who says I'm taking about your katana?" And he smirked.

"Kudoh!" came out of the strangled laugh. "You're shameless!"

....._All of the other florists  
.....Used to laugh and call him names_

"Not where I could hear them."

"Don't you remember your 'Ice Queen' title? I think that counts."

"Names, yes. Laugh at, no."

....._They never let poor Aya_

Sotto voice, "At least he's not so poor any more."

"Yes. It's good to have Aya-chan out of the hospital."

"And more money to spend on clothes! Or you'd better, before I burn that orange sweater!"

It appeared Aya could smirk as well. "You seemed to like it fine last month."

He paused in preparation for the next line. "Yes, but only because that and a pair of briefs were the only clothes you were wearing at the time."

....._Join in all their florist games_

"I wish you _would_ join in and make some of the arrangements."

"But awwww, Aya! No one makes ikebana arrangements like you!"

That got a crocus thrown at him. "Not everything we sell is ikebana, Kudoh. And you're not giving yourself enough credit. You don't do half bad with the wedding bouquets. And your centerpieces are always coordinated but balanced."

He blinked. Did Aya just compliment his flower arranging skills? Never mind; he could follow up on that later. He had a song to mangle.

....._Then one foggy Christmas Eve_

"Do you even know when that is?"

"Um... No, but I'm sure I can ask Aya-chan and Omi when they return from school."

Aya threw a petunia.

....._Santa came to say  
.....'Aya with your sword so bright_

"Do I even want to know how it's '_so bright_'?"

"Lube and candlelight reflecting off it, how else?"

A yellow tulip flew across the table, but of course he was able to dodge it.

....._Won't you go down on Yohji tonight?'_

"**KUDOH!** What if a customer came in, **RIGHT NOW**?"

As a threat, it was a hollow one. The laughter gave him away. Yohji only smirked a reply and continued singing.

....._Then how the florist loved him_

"Notice that's '_florist_,' singular. Better only be me."

"Better make it worth my while, then." Damn! No one could give that "cat in the cream" smile like Aya could. Maybe he was more susceptible to it than everyone else. Nah. Aya could seduce a rock if he wanted to. It was a deadly mix of looks, coyness, and knowing just how attractive Yohji – er, others – found him. Not that Aya believed himself to be beautiful; he only knew others thought him so.

....._As he shouted out with glee_

"Forget the shouting. I don't need everyone else to know what we're doing."

"Each other, you mean? No," he laughed, "I know, it's our secret. But that doesn't mean I can't whisk you away to a hotel some day and make you scream all I want there."

"Is that a promise?" Damn, again with coyness. This time the flower stayed in Aya's hand, but he did stroke the white violet against Yohji's cheek.

.....'_Aya the red haired florist_

Yohji found a red rose on the table, and brushed it down Aya's arm.

....._You'll go down on good old me!'_

Yohji didn't think Aya would have laughed quite so hard if he knew Mrs. Himura was entering the shop. Oh well. He'd pay for that later.

* * *

Later: 

As Aya opened Yohji's bedroom door, Yohji turned off the reading light as they had agreed long ago. He was halted with a whispered, "No, wait. Leave it on. And close your eyes."

He was curious, but Aya's surprises were good ones, so he obliged. He heard the lock snick, smelled a match strike, and possibly heard Aya walk about the room. While Aya was quiet, the floor _was_ a bit cluttered. A moment later the lamp clicked off and a kiss was placed on his forehead. "Okay, you can open your eyes now."

The room was now softly lit by several candles, but that's not what held his attention. That was centered on Aya in a tee shirt and pajama pants, with a curious bit of greenery tied to his waist over his stomach, and a tentative look on his face. "Yohji?"

He started to rise, but was halted. "Wait. Don't you recognize it?"

"What, cat?"

Aya pointed to the greenery, so Yohji took a closer look. It was a little branch of moss-green oval leaves with white berries. "I found some real ones, but decided on plastic when I found out they were poisonous."

Yohji looked up. "You'll have to tell me what it is, Aya. I don't recognize them."

Aya dug his toes in the carpet. Oh fuck. He hoped Aya didn't know how irresistible he was when was shy like this.

"It's mistletoe, Yohji. Yesterday you said you'd show me the tradition with it. Do I have it right?"

He felt a large grin grow on his face. "Close enough, cat. I'd say you have a pretty good idea what it is already."

That got him an small, shy smile in response, with the reply, "Aya-chan and Omi aren't the only ones who know how to use an internet search engine, you know. Now, kiss me. And make it good; you owe me for that damn song today."

With a prompt like that, how could he refuse? He rose and took Aya in his arms and gave him his best toe-curling kiss. Aya melted against him. As he pulled back to begin on Aya's neck came the soft voice, "Nice. But the mistletoe isn't over my lips. And I think '_going down on good old me_' will make up nicely for today's embarrassment, yes?"

He grinned. Should have known Aya wouldn't let it go that easily. Besides, the customer is always right, right? So he obliged.

-end-

Notes:

(1) The song and Christmas special of the previous fic are both "Ruldolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer." To get a taste of the TV special, read the reviews at Amazon (dot) com, especially the one from a "cousinpaco", who lists the wackier characters and gives a rough plot outline.

(2) If you want to hear the music and read the lyrics, see www(dot)northern-pine(dot)com(slash)songs(slash)rudolph(dot)html. It includes the optional opening stanza listing all the reindeer and also has the common echos, along with the song's history.

(3)And yes, Aya is sending mixed messages with the flowers and Yohji knows it. I used the meanings found at www(dot)victorianbazaar(dot)com(slash)meanings(dot)html but did try to stick to flowers commonly used by florists, since we don't know what type of arrangement Aya is making.

crocus: cheerfulness, abuse not, gladness

petunia: your presence soothes me

yellow tulip: there's sunshine in your smile

white violet: let's take a chance on happiness

red rose: love, I love you, respect, beauty

(4) A possibly-OOC Aya is explained by 1) Aya-chan is not only out of her coma, she's living with her brother - and do you think she'd put up with all his starch?! (See the manga!) They are siblings and so likely equally stubborn. And 2) the two of them are alone in the shop, and in a semi-relationship. Though I suspect Yohji will pay for that "cat" nickname.

(5) Thanks to Kaoru of _Rurouni Kenshin_ for the not-quite-a-cameo. I brought her forward to present day as I think she'd enjoy the sight of a red-head laughing as much as I do, though Aya doesn't know that.

(6) Mistletoe traditions can be found at www(dot)gardenersnet(dot)com(slash)flower(slash)mistle(dot)htm, and its darker roots are explained at mi (dot)essortment(dot)com(slash)hollymistletoeryqo(dot)htm . I was using the "if two people are standing under it together, they have to kiss" one. And as Aya notes, it is poisonous, so if you want to use it as he does, I suggest the plastic version for you, too.

(7) And my Yohji-muse owes me, Big Time, as I crossed the "I'll never write a song-fic" line with this story. Though he tells me it's only repayment for making him such an irritating person in the prequel and making him sneak around with Aya. To which I replied that sneaking around with Aya is better than no Aya at all. Still, we both apologize for having inflicted song-fic on you all, and

**May You All Have a Merry Saturnalia!**


	3. In the meantime

The Weiss Christmas Continues, Part III  
So what was everyone else up to on the day Yohji serenaded Aya in the Koneko? Because nothing says "RL avoidance" like another fic, no siree...

**_In the meantime..._**

"Do you think they'll figure out there was no extra credit?"

"Nah. Why would they? I'm the researcher in the group, after all, so they're used to me gathering and sharing data. And I don't lie to them much; I save it for special occasions." He kissed her on the cheek. "Like this. Well, not _this_ this; I know better than to lie to Aya-kun about his little sister."

She giggled. "I know what you mean. So, what do you think we should get Ken-kun?"

Omi pondered. "I hate to give him another football-related gift. What about this? He is Catholic, after all. And we can get him something else, too."

Aya-chan nodded. "It's a pretty little nativity scene. But are you sure porcelain will survive in his room?"

He laughed. "Ken-kun isn't a total klutz. It's his way of getting out of the shop. He prefers to make deliveries. All the running about, the fresh air – that kind of thing."

"Okay then. What else?"

"I don't know." They exchanged rueful glances. "We're going to end up in the sporting goods store, aren't we?"

"It looks that way. Too bad he's not a computer junkie, like you," she pinched his cheek, and immediately soothed it with a quick kiss, "I'd suggest a PDA to keep track of all his games, then. But it would never survive the football field. Ken-kun is a very hands-on coach."

He brightened. "Wait a minute, that's not a bad idea. And I know how we can make it work!"

* * *

The previously-mentioned Mrs. Himura tried to pull out her keys, but couldn't juggle the flower arrangement long enough to reach into her pocket. So, frowning, she rang the bell. 

It was soon answered by a giggling, flustered, frantic whirlwind, all centered around her husband.

"Milady! Back so soon?"

"Yes, dear. **HEY!** Back in the house, you!" While the child in question clearly was not intimidated – the giggles were a dead giveaway – at least she (he?) did obey and reenter the house. The arrangement had several close escapes before she and her husband managed to close the door with all ankle-biters safely inside. "I hope Yahiko appreciates the day off. His kids are a handful and a half!"

Before her husband could respond, her own handful entered the room. "Mom! Tell these brats I'm not a Barbie doll!"

She did her best to contain her giggles but it was a losing battle. "I see Sano and Saito left their kids here as well?"

"Moooom! They want to use make up! Like the braids aren't bad enough?!"

She exchanged a fond look with her spouse. "So, three little girls and one boy managed to overpower one master of the sword and one apprentice?"

Her husband sighed and took the bags from her arms while she held onto the arrangement. "It's a close battle and one still underway, my pardons. This one believes it was the attempt to bake that gave the little ones an advantage."

It was true the kitchen wasn't as big a mess as it could have been, but it was a close thing. "Here, put that arrangement up high and let's get started on this mess. I don't want Tsubame to return to a messy kitchen."

* * *

"Tell me again why we're out shopping for Christmas gifts for Nagi." 

"Because even though he is Japanese and therefore should not celebrate Christmas, the other three-fourths of Schwarz are from cultures that do, so of course he wants to. Besides, I'm the leader and I say so."

"Well, if you're going to be an utter bastard and pull rank like that, I want compensation."

"You can sleep in late tomorrow. Now help me find something for him already."

"Can't we get him some computer junk?"

"Like what? We'd have to know something more about computers to know what to buy. And don't even suggest clothes; I hated getting practical gifts as a boy."

"What? Do my ears deceive me? Bradley Crawford didn't like getting socks in his stocking?"

"No, you German slut, I did not. But I'm not sure if LEGO would be something he'd like at his age."

"Some dirty magazines, then?"

"**SCHULDIG!** We are supposed to be setting an example! And what kind of parents would give a boy something like that?"

A shrug. "Cool ones?"

A stare. "You really were raised by wolves, weren't you?"

"Doberman Pinschers, perhaps. And what's wrong with a gift certificate?"

"It's slapdash, and we have a reputation of professionalism to maintain."

A slack-jawed stare. "For fucking Christmas gifts?!"

"We are Schwarz. Our professionalism should show in everything we do. Besides, you don't complain when it applies to our sex life."

"That's different."

"No, it's not. Or shall I bite down during the next blow-job?"

A wince. "Okay, okay, I got it. Professionalism in all things." A pause. "Why not get him HALO2?"

"Isn't that rather violent?"

A blink. "Violent? Do you remember what we _do_ for a living? Does "killing" ring any bells?"

"Okay, fine, HALO2 is it. Now, do you remember the gaming system he uses?"

A shrug. "Doesn't matter. The kid's current one could stand to be updated. Get him an XBox as well; make his year – well, his month at least."

"Okay. But I'm still getting some LEGO kits."

"So you can play with them and relive your childhood? Okay, shutting up now. Better make them Bionicle kits."

"Sounds acceptable. Now, for the really tough challenge —"

"—Yes?"

"What to get Farfarello as a gift."

"That's a good one. What do you get a homicidal maniac who goes nuts at the sight of anything vaguely hinting of Christianity during that same Christianity's holiest time of the year?"

"That would be Easter, but you see the problem."

"We don't have to worry about Nagi's gifts setting him off, at least. HALO is anything but holy." A snicker. "Other than the weapon-made holes."

"Schuldig, focus!"

* * *

While it was nice to have a little sister of sorts, even if she wasn't really his little sister and was dating one of them — _definitely_ unsisterly-like activity — there were some times when it was a pain. Like now. It wasn't that he minded shopping for a gift for Aya-chan, but he always hated going in the girly parts of the department store. And what was he supposed to get her? Nothing too personal, or Aya would have his liver and Omi his spleen, but nothing impersonal, or she might not think he liked her. And he did, he really did. Aya was a much nicer person now and could even be caught almost-smiling on occasion; she helped keep Yohji in line (Who knew she could backtalk so well? And boy, but could she play the dozens!); and she gladly gave advice when he had that crush, even helping out with finding a gift. So it had to be a good gift, one that said "you're a good friend". 

And that's why he currently wandered the fragrance-cum-jewelry section of the store. Though he was pretty sure jewelry was a bad idea. Maybe someone else shopping here was in the same boat and he could ask them for help.

"Sir? Excuse me?"

"Yes?"

"I see you're looking at the bath fragrances, too. I'm shopping for my sister," it was close enough to the truth, they were a family of sorts, "and was wondering if you could recommend one."

"Sure! Be glad to help!" And his fellow shopper gave a polite, yet slightly goofy smile. He pointed. "This scent is good for general illnesses." Another bottle. "This scent is good for tuberculosis." And another. "This one helps with neuralgia."

Okay, this was weird. This guy was apparently an expert in scents for ill people. "May I ask who you're shopping for?" Because he really pitied them. Maybe he could burn a candle for each of them.

"Sure! It's one of my classmates!"

One classmate?! With all those illnesses? Not that being an assassin made him an expert on death or anything, but this person should be dead!

"Please offer their family my condolences. How long has he been in the hospital?"

He blinked. "No, Higurashi is fine. She just misses a lot of classes."

No, sounded like a case of skip-class-itis to him. He snickered.

"It's not funny. Poor Kagome is very sick."

And this guy was clueless. "I apologize. I did not mean to make light of your friend's plight. I offer my sympathy," because you're really don't get it, do you? And people called him slow. At least it was an act with him. Besides, his team had figured it out. It was only Kritiker and Manx who didn't know it was an act, which was just fine with him. Let Omi and Aya worry about the planning. He backed away as quietly as he could, leaving the clueless person behind.

Teasing from Yohji be damned. He was getting Aya-chan some doujinshi. What was the name of that circle she liked so much? Ryogetsu DX vs AtoZ SP? With any luck, he could find both some explicit volumes she'd like and some tamer ones that met Aya's approval to place on top and thus camouflage the rest.

* * *

"So why _do_ you like to celebrate Christmas? I thought you'd really want to kill someone right now." 

A cackle. "Kill them? And put them out of their misery? Besides, what's so holy about Christmas? Commercialism run amok, people trying for perfect gifts and gatherings and of course failing miserably, depression everywhere – God cries at Christmas, Nagi!"

"So that explains the blinking sweater."

"Why else? And think about all the poisons! Poinsettias, mistletoe, tinsel, wrapping paper! Toxic, all of it!" And so the laughter continued.

"I still say the candy canes on your eyepatch is a bit much."

"And the tooth-rotting delicacies! The sugar, the candy canes, the cookies, the gingerbread! And for adults, rum cake, rum balls, whiskey punch! More pain, more depression!"

He wished Schuldig was here to shut Farfarello up. Using his powers to pound him against the wall would be too obvious in this crowded mall.

"Look! Santa Claus praying at a manger! Tell me that's not a knife in God's gut! We have to get one!"

He hoped his patience would last for the rest of this shopping mission.

* * *

"Aya?" 

"Yes?"

"What do you think the others are up to?"

"Does it matter?"

"I'm boooored! Can't we close early?"

"No, Kudoh. And that's final."

"Meanie." And he blew a raspberry. "Bet anywhere else is better than here right now." He muttered, "No chances of sex when customers might come in, yadda yadda yadda."

"I heard that!"

"Beeda!"

* * *

"No, ma'am, I'm sorry, but we saw that PDA watch first! Give it back!"

* * *

"Kids! Settle down _now_ or no Christmas cookies when they're done baking!"

* * *

"You _will_ look in the back and you _will_ find me a set of Ginsu knives!"

* * *

"Oh look, it's one of those cute florists! **SQUEEEEEEE!**"

* * *

"Get off Santa's Village or I swear I _will_ crumple you and it into dust, I don't care how many people are in line to sit on Santa's lap."

* * *

The only one who might have known exactly how lucky Yohji was to be in the shop was Schuldig, but Schuldig was too busy trying to mind-whammy a brain-dead sales clerk to find this out, let alone tell Yohji. 

-end-

Commentary on scenes:  
1) Omi and Aya-chan, of course. Guessing on the "Ken as Catholic" based on his raising by nuns.

2) Poor Kaoru, Kenshin, and Kenji from _Rurouni Kenshin_. Brought 'em forward to present day because, well, it was fun. If you want to read a much better, more believable account of Kenshin and Kaoru in present day, check out Vathara's fics here on fanfiction(dot)net. I promise it's worth your time. Anyway, here the Himuras are visiting from America, where Kaoru has her own dojo. Kenji's her apprentice, of course, and not much older than the ankle-biters. They're staying with Yahiko and Tsubame, and are giving the couple the day off by looking after their kids. Apparently they extended the babysitting-for-the-day offer to Sano and Saito as well, who've adopted one or two abandoned kids they've come across during their time on the force. And yes, S & S are a couple. I'll figure out where Tokio and Megumi are later, same as Aoshi, Misao, and Hiko. The cooking? Silly Kenshin thought the kids might like to share in the American holiday and thought baking cookies with four kids ages 10 and under was a good idea. Note that the Himuras only have one child at present so he didn't know how kids in groups of three and greater like to gang up on adults.

3) A bit on the domestic side of Schwarz with Schuldig and Crawford as yes, they are a couple. (See "blow job" reference.) Schuldig is a bigger softy that he likes to let on; he _did_ notice that Nagi has a old gaming system. Brad really thinks he's getting the LEGO Bionicles for Nagi, but I suspect Schuldig will sneak a few for him, too.

4) Ken ran into Houjou from _Inuyasha_. Illnesses from Chris Rijk's translation site, www(dot)wot-club(dot)org(dot)uk(slash)Inuyasha(slash) , honest. And I'm working on Ken's character. I finally realized I can use a blend of two relatives because, well, to base him entirely on my sports-obsessed uncle would be too mean – to Ken. It's one of those "truth is stranger than fiction" situations: no one would believe a character _that_ obsessed with sports. "The Dozens" is an insult game: "Yo momma so fat, when she sits around the house, she sits around the house! – Well, yo momma so fat, she has her own ZIP code!" etc. Not sure at present who the crush was on; muses haven't revealed it. Doujinshi circle borrowed from nekojita because I don't know of any and the pics she's posted are pretty. (discrete drooling by author)

5) Nagi discussing the season with Farfarello. (Not a couple, _ick_, just two teammates out shopping.) It took Seraphim Grace's fics here on fanfiction(dot)net (silly but fun) to point out Farfarello just _might_ be pro-Christmas. And I wish I could claim Farfarello's examples, but I can't. They're real.

6) Yohji and Aya. "Beeda!" is that pull-down-eyelid, stick-tongue-out, make-noise combo insult Yahiko loves to give Kaoru. And very childish.

7) And a brief return to those in scenes 1-5.  
a) The watch really does exist;  
b) Kaoru knows giving sugar to kids is a Bad Thing, but is gambling cookies are a diluted enough form;  
c) anyone who's worked retail at Christmas knows there's no way Schuldig can successfully mind-whammy that poor clerk;  
d) poor Ken should have figured that anyone female who drools over them at the shop is likely into yaoi doujinshi as well – all those pretty boy-men!  
e) and can you really blame Nagi? Farfarello made him wait in line to sit on Santa's lap.


	4. Dreaming of a Black Christmas

It's Weiss Christmas, Part IV!  
Schuldig demanded equal time with Yohji, saying he and Balinese are _both_ sluts and what kind of American-cum-yaoifangirl would I be if I played favorites? To which I answered he needed to make it worth my while, as Balinese is a _cooperative_ slut-muse and thus easy to write. After much "negotiation" (he tried mind whammies, I used keyboard whammies), I give you --

**_Dreaming of a Black Christmas_**

Schuldig mourned.

"I had it all figured out. Ginsu knives were the perfect gift for Farfarello, and now they're sold out! They're from Japan, for Christ's sake; they shouldn't ever sell out of them here!"

Crawford patted him awkwardly on the back. While they did feel a certain affection for each other, physical gestures between them were usually of a more lascivious nature. "There, there. I'm sure they're not actually from Japan. It's got to be a marketing ploy." But this pitiful attempt at reassurance went unheard. Schuldig had whipped himself into another dramatic frenzy and wouldn't calm down until he was done. In these instances it was usually best to stand clear and enjoy the show.

"I even had the packaging figured out!" Crawford wondered if Schuldig would try to simulate frothing at the mouth this time. It appeared not. Looked like it was tears on tap today. Oh well. Variety, life, spice, and all that. "I was going to include tin cans and tomatoes so he could simulate the damn commercial!" _That_ drew Crawford's attention.

"Where would you get tin cans in this day and age? Everything's in steel or aluminum."

Schuldig shrugged, dramatic fit dissipating. "Was going to include a few beer cans."

"Wouldn't slicing through beer cans be messy? I hope you were planning on cleaning up the mess yourself!"

"Relax, Bradley, they would be empty."

Crawford shook his head. "One, it's pretty cheap to include your garbage in a present for your own teammate; and two, my name is _Brad_. Not Bradley, not Bradford, not Braddy-kins, and certainly not Brad-meister."

"But 'Brad' sounds like something at an office supply store! Staples, paperclips, _brads_, and other fasteners, aisle 3." Schuldig pointed at each of the imaginary bins and their contents.

"For the millionth time, Brad is a perfectly fine name. It's much better than, say, _Christian_."

"No, it's not, Thumbtack. Oops, _Brad_." Schuldig leered. "You know what else fits in the brads and tacks category? _Stud_. C'me here, you."

Brad planted his hand in the middle of Schuldig's face in mid-pucker and shoved him back. "You'd think you would have come up with an original joke, but no. It's been the same name-related jokes for over five years now. Is this a hint you want a joke book for Christmas?"

A pouting Schuldig stuffed his hands in his pockets as they continued down the mall. "No, I do _not_ want a joke book for Christmas or a book of any kind." He considered the matter. "Unless it was one of those books of questionable etchings you're always hearing about in Victorian novels and Monty Python skits."

"I said no porn for Christmas! This is supposed to be wholesome, dammit!"

"Do we even _do_ wholesome? Do we know what wholesome is?"

"Yes, we can do wholesome, now that Esset is scattered. We can do anything we want."

"Anything?"

"_Almost_ anything. Consider it a unique experience. We'll have at least one wholesome Christmas and then we'll never have to repeat it again."

"Okay. I guess I can live with that."

They continued in silence for a while.

"So, what do you want other than porn?"

He shrugged. "Beer's good. Or if you want to give a more traditional alcohol, you could make it brandy. Or rum. If you gave me rum, we could make rum balls –"

"Do _not_ continue that sentence. I'll think about it."

More silence.

"Brad?" The voice was almost shy, it was so quiet. "What do you want for Christmas?" His innate cockiness quickly reasserted itself with the next sentence, vanquishing any accidental appearance of vulnerability. Or caring. "Within reason, of course. I'm not made of money and you know I'm bad at keeping promises to behave."

Crawford pondered, then pronounced, "Ties."

"Ties?! You already have over 50 ties! Last time I gave you one, you got all fussy about the color!"

"It was a print with a naked girl doing the hula, if I remember correctly."

"And you said you didn't want a practical gift!"

"That was for Nagi and I don't want it to _wear_ it."

"But –" Schuldig paused, trying to think why Crawford would want a tie that he wouldn't wear. Then the light dawned. "Oooo."

"At least four would be good. I'd prefer silk as it's softer. Color doesn't matter, but something that matched your eyes, hair, or some other body part would be romantic, I suppose."

Schuldig grinned. "You are a softy, aren't you?"

Crawford sniffed. "I'm tired of the crease marks in my good ties, is all. And if they should rip, there's no harm done." He leaned closer to Schuldig. "And if I ever hear that sentence come out of your mouth again, I'll have to punish you."

Which resulted in a leer. "I'll have to find out if anyone sell ties in bulk – so you can properly punish me, of course."

"Of course."

.---.---.---.

The following day saw Schuldig back at the mall, this time with Nagi. Crawford was left to figure out what to do with a Farfarello who wouldn't stop singing along to '_Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas_' with Rosemary Clooney. It didn't matter if Nagi destroyed the CD; he'd already done that several times but Farfarello had a stash of them hidden somewhere even Schuldig couldn't find. And after two days of this, Farfarello didn't really need the CD anymore; he could imitate her vocalisms on his own. Combine the constant singing with yesterday at the American-themed mall and Nagi was all for an updated Jack in the Box called "Farf In A Shoebox", but no one really wanted that. Not yet anyway.

So Schu was dispatched back to the mall with Nagi to get him away from Farfarello and to complete their shopping. Along the way they would hopefully find some less annoying recording for Farfarello to emulate. The trick was finding something that would appeal to his tastes but wasn't too annoying. Nagi threatened Schuldig with neutering when he suggested the barking dogs before they left, but that wasn't needed as Crawford hated them with a passion usually reserved for decrepit old people set on ruling the world.

"So..."

"Yes?"

"What are you getting Farf?"

"Found a copy of that '_Santa versus Jesus_' video done by that show that looks like animated construction paper. It's actually kind of funny."

"Can I go in with you on that?"

"No, Schuldig, you cannot. Don't think about getting him that damn singing Christmas tree, either."

Silence.

"Got any ideas on what _I_ can get for Farf?"

"Something from that store would be good." Nagi nodded to the left.

Schuldig was aghast. "That store?! It's filled with nothing but merchandise that plays to every offensive ethnic stereotype of Europeans there is! There's plastic lederhosen, snails and garlic in a can, castanets and crucifixes gift sets, how-to Mafia handbooks, deerstalkers and briar pipes –"

"And 'Kiss Me, I'm Irish' tee shirts in Kelly green with a fighting leprechaun, beer mug in hand."

"Farf would kill me if I gave him that!"

"No," came the patient answer, "he wouldn't. He'd either happily destroy it or happily wear it. It's a win-win situation."

"Huh. That _is_ a good idea." A pause. "So, what are you getting for Brad?"

"Schuldig, I am _not_ telling you what to get your boyfriend."

"He's not my boyfriend, he's my fuck buddy."

"Po-TAY-to, po-TAH-to."

"You're too young to be that cynical."

"Schuldig. I'm seventeen now, remember."

"Oh, right. Okay, you've been in too few relationships to be that cynical. Better?"

"Yes, actually. Why do you know what I got for Crawford?"

"Curious. You did a good job with ideas for Farf."

"Okay. I got Crawford Muraki's Eyeglass Solution."

"Never heard of it."

"It's an eyeglass cleaner. Makes your glasses extra glinty."

Schuldig burst out laughing. "He'll love it. Ah, the apprentice has surpassed the master – NOT!" And gave Nagi a noogie in the middle of the mall, much to his embarrassment.

.---.---.---.

Crawford looked ready to take Nagi up on his "FarfBox" offer when they returned. Nat King Cole's '_The Christmas Song_' didn't meet Farfarello's approval so they reluctantly handed over the Burl Ives recording. Crawford declared that he foresaw a psychotic rampage in his future if he didn't get out of there _right now_ and Nagi was more than happy to go out again with him; anywhere was fine as long as it didn't have a singing Farfarello. Both of them agreed it was Schuldig's turn to stay at home with their one-eyed Father Christmas.

This time the trip was for culinary supplies. Nagi was all for having a catered meal, but one, Crawford didn't like the expense and two, he pointed out Japan wasn't exactly overflowing with restaurants that carried acceptable Christmas meals or even a glazed ham. They compromised on side dishes, agreeing there could be a variety of ethnicities to reflect the makeup of the team. As Crawford was American, this opened the door to practically anything Nagi wanted.

With one of the Christmas movies in mind, Nagi suggested a duck from a Chinese restaurant as the main course but Crawford insisted they look through another neighborhood or two for a leg of lamb or a turkey. He wasn't giving up just yet.

They were on their eighth (or was it tenth? Nagi lost count once his feet went numb) store, this one on the opposite side of Tokyo, when he saw a familiar face – or rather, head of hair.

"Nagi? Are you coming?"

"Go ahead to the butcher counter. I'll catch up." Crawford shrugged and continued to the back.

Nagi made eye contact with one of the two people next to that familiar head of hair and pointed to the produce section. The other person nodded and left the checkout line.

"Greetings, Crusher15. What are you doing here? I thought Perry preferred the store in your neighborhood."

"Salutations, Bowdart10. Nah, Perry has this idea we need to find the ideal Christmas meat, so we're trekking all over Tokyo in search of it."

"Is it just the two of you? Or is the rest of Niger here, too?"

"Cruller and Guinness are at home, thank the gods."

"Oh, Guinness still overfull with season's greetings?"

"Yes, and letting everyone in earshot know it, too. Cruller and I did find something different to play but I still wish he'd shut up."

"We had a similar problem with Inari and a Christmas special. He wouldn't shut up during the show and yesterday wouldn't stop singing the song the show was based on, saying it was punishment for making him watch it."

"Couldn't have been worse than Guinness and Rosemary Clooney."

"Imagine it was only one song rather than an entire album. And the song was about a deer."

"What does a deer have to do with Christmas?"

"I'm not sure. I think they take Santa Claus everywhere."

"If he's as fat as some of the songs say, I don't see how that's possible."

Bowdart10 shrugged. "Same way the one deer's nose glows."

"A deer with a glowing nose?! That deer wouldn't be Rudolph, would it?"

"You've heard of him?"

"Over and over and over again, _YES_! It's the first song on the album! – Why didn't Oishi kill Inari?"

"Why else? Special privileges, same as Crueller has with Perry."

"Oh. Too bad."

"You said it. Package thought the whole thing was cute."

"She would. Girls like that kind of thing, don't they?"

"She does, anyway. Say, how did you do on the calculus test?"

"Aced it. Please thank Package for proofreading the essay on the history of computers."

"I will. She appreciated the review; she's taking an intro to networks class and forgot how much she was supposed to know. Can't have the instructor knowing she's a super geek, after all."

"Yeah, might suspect her of being a hacker – not that we know any." They exchanged a laugh. "Say, why did you keep that nickname for her? If she ever finds out about it, you might be in trouble."

"I thought about it, but calling her Amaterasu is too obvious and Oishi might suspect something."

"You're running an equal chance of Oishi flattening you for calling his sister Package. It sounds like a vague sexual reference."

A fond sigh. "Yeah, it does, doesn't it? She certainly is cute." He shook his head to clear it. "Looks like they finally made through the line. I better go." He nodded. "It was good to see you. Same time tonight?"

Crusher15 grinned. "You got it. Expect me to kick your butt!"

Bowdart10 returned the grin. "You can try! I almost got that punch-kick combo down, so _you_ better be ready; you're going down!" He waved and left.

Crawford joined Nagi in the produce section.

"Any turkey or lamb?"

"No, dammit. Do I want to ask if that was Bombay?"

"Do you really want to hear the answer to that?"

"I suppose not. Since no one is chasing after us with a katana and yelling 'Die', I can assume he hasn't told the others we survived."

"That would be correct."

"Why wasn't I told?"

He shrugged. "We figured we weren't in active opposition after surviving the museum's collapse."

Crawford gave him a hard look. " Why talk with him at all?"

"It's nice to talk with someone who understands what it's like to balance school and a night job, particularly one like ours. I get help with my homework, too."

"If I told you to stop?"

Nagi coolly returned Crawford's stare. "I would argue it would be against the best interests of the team. We exchange information on targets and avoid tripping each other up with overlapping hacks."

Crawford continued to stare, but Nagi remained impassive. Finally, Crawford released his gaze. "Be sure it remains beneficial to Schwarz."

"Of course. – Did you want to go to another store?"

"No. I had a vision at the counter. It will be Peking duck, as you suggested."

Nagi grinned and tried not to look too happy.

.---.---.---.

When they returned home, they were greeted not with a tenor voice but a high-pitched, tinny noise complete with bouncy background music. Crawford's face became grim.

"I feared he might have a copy of _that_ hidden. Schuldig must have really pissed him off."

Inside Schuldig was curled up in a fetal position (it was under the mistletoe, Nagi noted with some irony) in the hallway between the common area and bedrooms. He saw Schuldig was rocking and his mouth moving, but couldn't make out the words until he crouched down next to him.

"...it stop make it stop make it stop make it stop make it stop..."

Schuldig had survived five years of life on the streets and another five years of indoctrination by Esset and Rosenkreuz, but it appeared two hours of one Christmas album done what they could not and broken him. It might have been Farfarello's nasal attempt at replicating the high-pitched squeals, but Nagi wasn't sure. He suspected the unaccompanied album alone was enough to loosen one's grip on sanity.

"Farfarello. I have Bing Crosby's '_White Christmas_' here. Step away from '_Merry Christmas with the Chipmunks_' and it's yours." Wow. Crawford really _was_ brave.

Farfarello paused in mid "wahoo, wahoo" to ask, "Does it have 'Silver Bells'?"

Crawford nodded. "Yes, and 'Jingle Bells', too."

Farfarello gave his best scary grin, the one that gave Nagi nightmares. "God bless us, every one!" And snatched the CD up and ran back to his room with it.

Crawford walked over to the CD player, pressed 'stop', then 'open'. After removing the CD he snapped it in half, then in half again. "That's one aspect of my childhood I wouldn't wish on anyone." Sighing, he walked over to the still-rocking Schuldig and crouched by the pitiful figure.

"Schuldig? It's okay. I broke the CD."

The rocking paused. "No more Alvin?"

"No more Alvin," agreed Crawford.

"No more Dave?"

"No more Dave. Before you ask, no more Simon or Theodore, either. Now, why don't you go to bed, hm? Tomorrow's the Emperor's Birthday, so you can sleep late." That got Schuldig to raise his head.

"Will you tuck me in?"

Crawford rolled his eyes. "Yes, I'll even tuck you in, you German slut," he added, almost fondly.

There was a moment of silence before the voice spoke again. "Join me, too?"

He stroked the hair back from Schuldig's face. "As soon as Nagi and I get the groceries out of the car and put away, yes."

"Oh. Okay." He allowed Crawford to usher him back to the bedrooms.

Nagi went ahead and started bringing in the groceries. It was late and dark enough that he thought it safe to use his powers to add more bags to his arms and so reduce his trips. He had the car emptied by the time Crawford returned to the front rooms.

As they silently put away the items together, a thought occurred to Nagi.

"Crawford?"

"Yes?"

"Didn't you foresee that something might happen between Farfarello and Schuldig?"

A truly evil smile appeared on his face. "Yes."

Nagi sighed. "He called you an office supply product again, didn't he?"

-end-

Long notes section this time!  
(1) Ginsu knives of many TV commercials. You can see them at asseenontv(dot)com. They're supposedly made of Japanese steel and never need sharpening, so you can see why Schuldig thought them a good gift. Commercials showed them slicing through a tin can, then a tomato.  
(2) Canon is Crawford's name is a simple "Brad Crawford", but fans like to add to it. Christian is fanon's real name for Schuldig, of course.  
(3) 'Questionable etchings' are Victorian porn. Look up "Aubrey Beardsley erotica" for a sample. The MP 'photograph' sketch makes a passing reference to this category of art.  
(4) Brandy is usually added to eggnog and rumballs are a real cookie. Since they're not baked they have a very high alcohol content. Think of them as kin to jello shots but with flour.  
(5) I really think Crawford should have asked for five ties minimum. The fifth could be used as a gag or blindfold. Hm. Maybe it should be six?  
(6) I've scattered various Christmas albums that were considered classic by my family or friends' families while growing up. For song lists, you can look them up on amazon(dot)com. Titles and artists are:  
a) "_Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas_" by Rosemary Clooney  
b) "_Christmas Unleashed_" by Jingle Dogs - this was the barking dog album  
c) "_The Christmas Song_" by Nat King Cole  
d) "_Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer_" by Burl Ives (has all the songs from the TV show mentioned in earlier chapters)  
e) "_White Christmas_" by Bing Crosby  
f) The last one combines the album title with the artist. Don't want to ruin the story. author grins  
(7) The "_Jesus v. Santa_" video is the short made by Matt Stone and Trey that led to them getting their own show, "_South Park_". See for details.  
(8) I'm with Nagi. I waited in a return line next to one of these motion-activated Christmas trees for one hour. Not only was it butt-ugly, it was a bad recording as well. When looking it up for this story, I was glad to see no recent webpages.  
(9) I don't know if a store like this exists in Japan, but I've seen some dangerously close to this in the US; some Spencers and local tee shirt boutiques come to mind.  
(10) For the tee shirt, imagine the University of Notre Dame's leprechaun with a beer mug in hand. Sadly, it's a typical St. Patrick's Day decoration.  
(11) I added two years to everyone's age to safely get us through Kapitel and the OAVs.  
(12) After Dr. Muraki of "_Yami No Matsuei_". Another glinty-glasses guy of anime. Heh.  
(13) Nagi's thinking of the Chinese restaurant scene in "_A Christmas Story_", _my_ favorite Christmas movie. Think: Red Rider BB Gun.  
(14) He saw red hair, of course.  
(15) They're both online gamers and hackers, so they're speaking with the nicknames they use in IM for their teammates. And no, I'm not giving them away, but I will explain the nicknames.  
a) Crusher15 from his powers  
b) BowDart10 from his weapons  
c) Perry is the American Commodore who led the Black Ships in 1853 that forced Japan to open trade with the West.  
d) Niger is Latin for "black".  
e) Cruller is a pastry, as is a "Berliner". I think both are German, hint hint.  
f) Guinness is an Irish beer.  
g) Inari is the kami of foxes and kitsune. (This one is tricky, but you should be able to figure it out from the conversation. Does it help if I say kitsune are known for being sexy and seductive?)  
h) Oishi Kuranosuke was the leader of the 47 ronin and chief counselor of dishonored daimyo Lord Asano. Short version: he planned and schemed for two years but eventually got revenge on the person responsible for their lord's dishonor and so redeemed Lord Asano's honor. Famous story of bushido. Read it here: victorian(dot)fortunecity(dot)com(slash)duchamp(slash)410(slash)47ronin(dot)html.   
g) Package: well, she was passed around like a package for most of the second half of Kapitel, yes? And Amaterasu is the Japanese sun goddess from whom the emperor is descended. (Someone thinks a lot of this person, hint hint.)  
(16) I pulled the years for street life and training out of my butt. But they sound good, yes? And canon never said anything about Schuldig on the streets; that's fanon again.  
(17) Farf purloined Tiny Tim's line from "_A Christmas Carol_".  
(18) Alvin, Simon, and Theodore are the Chipmunks; Dave Seville is their creator and sings with them in normal voice as well. It's _my_ favorite Christmas album but I already know I'm weird.  
(19) The Emperor's birthday is a holiday in Japan. It's currently December 23.

I have no idea if there will be more installments. You'll have to ask the muses about that.  
23Dec2004


End file.
